There’s a space between “rock bottom” and “business as usual” that rarely gets airtime in conversations about alcohol. It’s where most people actually live—questioning whether their drinking serves them, curious about alternatives, but not identifying with traditional recovery language or abstinence-only approaches.
Denise Hamilton-Mace has built her entire platform in that messy middle. As the founder of Low No Drinker and the podcast “Mindful Drinking & Moderation in Midlife,” she champions personal choice over rigid labels, serving what she calls “curious drinkers”—people who want to examine their relationship with alcohol without necessarily ending it. Her stance has gotten her both celebrated and rejected, including being uninvited from podcasts that couldn’t handle her nuanced approach to sobriety and moderation.
In this conversation, Denise shares her 24-year career in hospitality, why she never hit a “rock bottom,” how alcohol became invisible in her daily routine, and why she believes the most powerful creative work comes from knowing yourself deeply—which requires the kind of clarity that drinking, even moderately, can obscure. Whether you’re sober, sober-curious, or simply exploring what feels right for you, this episode offers permission to define your own path forward.
Show Notes
[00:00] Welcome & Introduction
Denise has carved out a unique and controversial space championing moderation, curiosity, and personal choice over one-size-fits-all approaches
She serves “curious drinkers” in their 30s, 40s, 50s and beyond who are cutting back, mixing it up, or wondering if there’s something better
Her stance has gotten her both celebrated and rejected—she was uninvited from a podcast after rebranding to include “moderation” in her title
[02:45] Growing Up in London’s Drinking Culture
Started drinking in mid-to-late teens in London parks with strong cider and cigarettes
Despite throwing up at her first party, she discovered she was “really good at drinking and really enjoyed it”
Got her first pub job at 18 and spent 24 years in hospitality—pubs, bars, restaurants, events
She hosted events attended by the late Queen and worked everywhere from race courses to high-end venues
[06:45] When Social Drinking Becomes Invisible Habit
Denise never had a dramatic “rock bottom” or crisis moment with alcohol
After leaving hospitality and having children, drinking shifted from social to solitary—wine at home became routine
The turning point: realizing alcohol had become invisible, automatic, and no longer a conscious choice
She describes it as “doing things on autopilot”—the realization that she wasn’t present in her own life
[11:30] The Four-Month Experiment That Changed Everything
Started with Dry January, extended it to four months to prove she could
The first two weeks were rough—dealing with habitual cravings and social pressure
Discovered she didn’t miss alcohol as much as she expected
When she did drink again, she was shocked by how awful it made her feel physically
[15:15] Finding Your Own Definition of Success
Denise realized she wanted control over her choices rather than having alcohol control her
She didn’t want to declare herself “sober” or “in recovery” because those labels didn’t fit her experience
The goal became drinking on her own terms—sometimes yes, sometimes no, always intentional
She emphasizes there’s no single right answer for everyone
[18:00] The Toxic Binary in Alcohol Conversations
Both the pro-drinking and anti-drinking camps can be judgmental and dismissive
People who moderate get criticized from both sides: “not serious enough” for the sober community, “uptight” for the drinking crowd
Denise refuses to apologize for her position anymore—she recognized more people feel the way she does
The rejection she’s faced has actually strengthened her conviction to serve this overlooked middle ground
[20:30] How Clarity Unlocked Her Creativity
In her hospitality career, Denise was repeatedly told “you’re not very creative”—and she believed it
She internalized that message until she changed her drinking and launched a magazine
Created, edited, designed and laid out 15 issues over two and a half years—all by herself
Now channels all her creativity into her podcast and Substack writing
[26:00] Self-Knowledge as the Foundation of Creative Work
Denise knows herself better in her 40s than at any point in her life
She has more self-confidence and self-belief—not ego, but clarity about what she knows and cares about
She may not have millions of followers, but she gets emails from people saying “are you in my brain?”
The creative joy comes from expressing what she’s passionate about in ways that connect with others on their journey to “a life less intoxicated on their own terms”
Key Quotes
“I never had the sad story. I was never in recovery. So I was like, well, I’m not anti-alcohol, so should I have a voice in this space? And then I realized a lot more people actually feel a similar way to what I do.” - Denise Hamilton-Mace
“I know myself better now in my 40s than I have at any point in my life. I have more self-confidence, more self-belief. That doesn’t mean I’m some sort of big giant walking ego. There’s loads of stuff I don’t know. But the things that I do know about and that I am passionate about, I throw myself into it.” - Denise Hamilton-Mace
“This is not something I could have done if I was drinking the way that I was beforehand. I am able to absorb information, to get curious, to ask questions, to research things, to put it together in a way that feels authentically me.” - Denise Hamilton-Mace
“You never know who you might help with one article, one episode, one post, one comment—somebody just seeing someone that looks like them or sounds like them or has a similar story. I think that’s a really privileged position to be in, and I’m very grateful for it.” - Denise Hamilton-Mace
Resources Mentioned
Mindful Drinking & Moderation in Midlife Podcast – 115+ episodes exploring the intersection of mindful drinking and midlife
Low No Drinker Magazine – Created, edited, designed and produced by Denise over 15 issues
4-Week Midlife Mindful Drinking Reset – Denise’s program for people wanting to change their drinking habits
Power Hour Coaching – One-on-one support for navigating alcohol decisions
Dry January – The initial catalyst for Denise’s four-month drinking experiment
Where to Find Denise Hamilton-Mace
Podcast: Mindful Drinking & Moderation in Midlife (available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and all major platforms)
Website: mindfuldrinkinginmidlife.com
Ready to Unlock Your Creative Potential?
If Denise’s story resonates with you—if you’re sensing that something’s holding you back but you’re not sure what—you don’t have to figure it out alone.
The Sober Creative Method™ is a 90-day journey designed specifically for creatives who are ready to remove alcohol as a barrier to their greatest work. It’s not about deprivation—it’s about expansion. It’s about discovering what happens when you stop performing and start living.
Inside the program, you’ll discover:
How to build unshakeable clarity around your relationship with alcohol
Tools for sitting with discomfort instead of numbing it
Strategies for navigating social situations without compromising your values
How to channel the energy you used to spend drinking into your most meaningful work
Thank You
A heartfelt thank you to everyone who joined us live for this conversation, and to Denise Hamilton-Mace for her honesty, courage, and commitment to serving the overlooked middle ground. Your presence and engagement make these conversations possible.
What’s Next
The Sober Creative is more than a newsletter—it’s a movement of individuals reclaiming their creativity by choosing clarity over coping.
The 30-Day Alcohol-Free Reset starts on January 1st.
If you want to see what your creativity feels like without alcohol in the way, this is your moment.
Join the early list and I’ll notify you the second doors open.
🎯 Take the Clarity Quiz: This assessment reveals certain areas where alcohol may be the exact thing that is quietly sabotaging your creative potential. It’s free and only takes a few minutes.
✍️ Read the Essays: Stories and strategies for building a clear, creative, and intentional life.
🎙️ Join Clear Conversations: Honest talks with creative professionals navigating the intersection of sobriety, self-discovery, and breakthrough work.
💬 Curious about your next step? If you’re sensing that something’s holding you back, but you’re not sure what—reach out. Coaching, community, or clarity—it all starts with a conversation.
✨ The Sober Creative Method™ is a 90-day journey to remove alcohol as the barrier to your greatest work.
Each step forward is an act of becoming who you’re meant to be.
Thanks for walking this path with me.
Josh
P.S. Missed previous episodes? Browse the Clear Conversations archive to explore more conversations with creative minds in sobriety.
